About me: My name is Maria Zakourdaev. I have more than 10 years experience with SQL Server (starting from SQL Server 6.5). The last five years have been spent mostly on benchmarking different SQL Server features and flows, like data import, indexes impact on DML flows, star transformations in RDBMS, Hierarchic queries and custom OLAP-like aggregations. I was a speaker in the Microsoft Teched (Israel) on the SQL Server track. I am also an active member of the Israel SQL Server Group.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Nice SQL jokes

Q: Why do you never ask SQL people to help you move your furniture?
A: They sometimes drop the table

A SQL query walks into a bar and sees two tables. He walks up to them and says 'Can I join you?'

Is you closet is ordered by size, then colour, then style?

Q1: What did the DBA say to the Developer?
A: It doesn’t matter, he wasn’t listening anyway.
Q2: What did the Developer say to the DBA?
A: It doesn’t matter, the answer was no.

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